Kerna mereka benar-benar sayang

Today was my breaking point. From morning till evening, I was tested. By my feelings and by the people around me. Though I promised that I won't feel numb from it. I would not want to let these dark incidences cloud away my light.

No. Cahaya yang Allah bagi ini takkan aku biarkan padam hanya kerana ujian hari ini.

Despite saying as such, I did cry. I stopped crying, and cried again. And I know that when I go to bed tonight, I will cry as well.

But I know, Allah will never take me for granted. And for all that has happened, I believe that He will give me my happy ending.

*imagining lying below a shady tree in Jannah wearing robes of green and bracelets made of jade*

And I am blessed because during these times, there are people whom Allah gifted to come and shower me with words of motivation.

Ilyani hugged me close.
Haziqah cried for me.
Najhan gave me kind words and du'a.
Kak Siha, sent me emojis.
Farah, Adnin, Wani, Ella, Opie and Aimi helped remind me that I have friends around the world praying for my well-being.
And Yana, reminded me to seek help in patience and prayers.

I am blessed. Always have. Because above all, I have you Allah.
Alhamdulillah, thumma alhamdulillah.

وَاسْتَعِينُوا بِالصَّبْرِ وَالصَّلاةِ وَإِنَّهَا لَكَبِيرَةٌ إِلا عَلَى الْخَاشِعِينَ ,الَّذِينَ يَظُنُّونَ أَنَّهُمْ مُلاقُو رَبِّهِمْ وَأَنَّهُمْ إِلَيْهِ رَاجِعُونَ 

"Dan mintalah pertolongan (kepada Allah) dengan sabar dan solat. Dan sesungguhya hal itu sangat berat, kecuali bagi orang-orang yang  khusyu’ , (iaitu) orang-orang yang menyakini, bahawa mereka akan menemui Rabb mereka dan bahawa mereka akan kembali kepada-Nya" (Al-Baqarah 2:45-46)